


The Beginning of Nightmare

by ara_nakayama12



Category: Free!
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Crying Nanase Haruka, Hurt, Implied Relationships, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Insecurity, M/M, Mentioned Matsuoka Rin, Self-Harm, mentioned tono hiyori
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-13
Updated: 2019-11-13
Packaged: 2021-01-30 01:16:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,459
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21419803
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ara_nakayama12/pseuds/ara_nakayama12
Summary: Makoto knew, whatever he did, he would not be able to emit a fire behind those bright Sapphire. Whatever, he said, would not be able to make the freestyle swimmer's passion blaze wildly. The only one who can make it is the fire. The fire who comes unpredictably into their lives, in fact, was capabled enough of making significant changes. As soon as he came, and as soon as he disappeared too was able to make their flat world rising and fall..."You're stupid, Makoto!" He sobbed quietly."You are stupid!".
Relationships: Nanase Haruka & Tachibana Makoto, Nanase Haruka/Tachibana Makoto
Comments: 2
Kudos: 35





	The Beginning of Nightmare

**Author's Note:**

> Here, my first English story. As you know, English isn't my first language. so, I'm very sorry if it containing so many grammatical errors.

Makoto knew, whatever he did, he would not be able to emit a fire behind those bright Sapphire. Whatever, he said, would not be able to make the freestyle swimmer's passion blaze wildly. The only one who can make it is the fire. The fire who comes unpredictably into their lives, in fact, was capable enough of making significant changes. As soon as he came, and as soon as he disappeared too was able to make their flat world rising and fall. He felt pathetic and disgusting. Secretly hiding his feeling for years and Continued to denied it when his heart wants to shout it aloud. He always thinks everything will be fine and enough as long as he can still stand by his side. Thoughts, he knows that it has only been a false illusion. He loved that young man. However, most of his consciousness acknowledged that he was not fit to stand beside him. They... won't be able to stand on the same stage. And here the irony which had only been realized by him now. his body trembled in the embrace of cold water. his emerald which as bright as the savanna faded, hidden behind two large palms. “All you ever do is meddle with everyone! Stop sticking your nose in everyone else’s business!”

The words continued to spin like a tangled cassette in his mind. Dancing as if it wants to mock the reality of his life. Even though the words had been spoken a long time ago and they had made up with each other and even, their bond become stronger than before. But still, Makoto Tachibana had not been able to forgive Himself for the excessive treatment of His childhood best friend and the person who held the highest position in His heart.

"I ... am just a nuisance" he muttered as he sank his face into the cold water.

His mind dancing around again, circling as if competing to make fun of himself.

_'Coward!’ _

_‘Loser!’_

_ ‘Meddlesome!’_

_ 'Useless!'_

_ ‘You ... suck!’_

His body was startled when his other shadow seemed to stand right in front of him with a mocking smile. Every piece of his memories spinning again. His fist strengthened. He didn’t realize that his knuckles already turned white. Makoto cursed himself for being unable to act more for the person he loved. Not when he heard Hiyori Toono say a painful word, "Looks like everyone who swims with you ended up miserably." And not even when Rin Matsuoka, the fire that ignited the spirit of the water said harshly, "I don't want to swim with you anymore!" or when the sapphire feels down on his first defeat at a University matches.

All he did was stand still beside him or give the distance and time for him to calm down. He always gives support in silence without being able to do anything, and... Makoto hates his inability. He hates his incapable of providing more support through action. And when he tried to do an action, the result only made things got worse down to able made the ocean left him and went to Australia with Rin.

His memories are turning back far... far away when Rin suffered at his first defeated during regional relay with the Samezuka team. And when the red-headed man shouted frantically, "I will stop swimming!" Suddenly kicking the trash bin in front of him. The Jade clearly saw that the Sapphire was tearing up filled with hurt. His heart is broken. Certainly! But not because he shared the same sadness as the water, but because he understood. He understood how it undoubtedly hurt when we have to know that the people we care about must stop the things he loves the most — just like when they suddenly left the middle school swimming team before.

His large hand now shifted tightly to his throbbing chest with another hand encircling his own stomach. Suddenly, he feels nauseous. His sobbing was unstoppable when he realized that; he had fallen too far into his own feelings and more painful when he also knew that his love was only the feeling of one party that would never be reciprocated.

He knows be blinded by love is stupid and silly, but he allowed himself to do it. Standing with a faithful smile he always puts on with the hope that he can still stand beside his best friend. A fierce smile now engraved, at times other piercing words were voiced by his own mind. And, before another word appears, he already made his choice.

The fierce smile widened, as he trying to smile to accept his new freedom and grant another freedom to the one he loved. He holds up the pain that spreads in his body until he could not feel anything more. In the silence of the night, he could hear the dripped sound of water and the roar of his breathing that was slowing down. A drop of tears fell before his world turned black.

.

.

The stoic boy with blue eyes which bright as the open sea stood up patiently. He knocking on the door again, hoping Makoto will quickly open that damn door in front of him. The thought that the homeowner was outside crossed. His feet want to step away from the tightly closed door, but his heart refuses to do so. Finally, with a frustrating feel, he decides to use the spare key he keeps.

he Clicks on until the door opened slowly. Showing unusual dark space. A sense of wonder evaporated to the surface.

_'Weird.'_ He thought.

He glanced at the clock on the wall of the room, seven o'clock at night. His heart was pounding fast without reason. Today is Makoto's day off - both college and part-time workers as a swimming coach. He should be at home today. Faintly, coldness struck the nape of his neck. With a strange and restless feeling surrounding his stomach, he moved quickly to examine every room.

_ Dark and empty._

He even felt that the bed is still neat and cold- a sign that Makoto hadn't been there for a long time. Clicking in annoyance, because of the beating of his heart that continues to go crazy, his feet step into a small room of his favorite place. And when the door swung open, Haruka's body froze. His heartbeat increased and seemed to fall into his stomach. his blue eyes widened. He felt unbearable nausea as if his stomach had been hit by a stone. However, he quickly brushes aside the feeling and move quickly to reach for the towel and quickly run to the side of the big young man.

He ignored the clear liquid that was changing color now. He ties the towel tightly around his best friend's wrist who was now quiet with his bright emerald eyes tightly closed.

"Makoto!" He shouted continuously, after immediately taking out his cellphone and asking for an ambulance to come as soon as possible.

"Makoto... please!" He shouted in a pleading tone.

"Makoto, open your eyes!" Again and now he wishes to any God who is able to listen to his wishes.

He Hopes that his best friend's life is saved on time.

But, His heart beating escapes one beat when his senses slap him to reality. Makoto's body felt as cold as ice. In silence, he could hear the cracking of his world, which collapse in an instant. He embraces his best friend into a tight hug. While continuing to hope that he could provide the warmth of his body to him. And also, praying to God to give him enough time so he can save the most precious person in his life.

He kept calling his best friend's name, patting his cheek slowly and kept hoping that help would come soon. Until, the Sapphire caught a piece of paper stuck to the wall - right next to Makoto. His blue eyes widened and seemed to burn. In silence, he read every word written on the paper.

_"I'm sorry for being a nuisance to you guys. Sorry for always meddling in your business. And for my best friend, Haruka, sorry that I love you. Please, continue to swim freely until the top of the world, Haru-chan. I really... really like you. Goodbye. I gave this freedom to you. Makoto Tachibana- "_

His teary blue eyes now screamed loudly. Shed his greatest sadness and fear. His embrace is getting harder. his body trembling violently with a heartbreaking sob.

"You're stupid, Makoto!" He sobbed quietly.

"You are stupid!"

"I... I love you too! You idiot, idiot! "

"I love you, Makoto... because of that... please, open your eyes and stay with me!" He sobbed in silence.

“Please… Makoto!”

But, his pleads only got answered by the silence.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you all for reading. I hope you enjoyed this.


End file.
